Dear World,
Meeting at the Pinwheel Coffee shop couldn’t have been more fitting. My brain was a pinwheel of emotions, whirling and spinning almost out of control, as I played out every possible scenario about how our meeting would go. Would he want to rectify things and get back together? Was he at the point where he simply just didn’t have room for me in his life? Would apologies be enough? Before I even took in the strong aroma of espresso, our eyes locked between the pain of glass, and I instantly knew.
Divorce is not easy. No matter which end you’re on, it sucks. Starting over sucks. Rebuilding yourself sucks. Learning how to trust again sucks. However, coming out of the pit and onto the other side with someone who knows what it’s like, is a comforting feeling. I have no room for my ex in my life, or anyone like him in my life, for that matter. But THIS person isn’t anything like him. He’s deep and empathetic. He’s reflective and honest. He’s recognizing and reflecting and rebuilding the life he deserves and the person he wants to be. So when he asked me to meet him for coffee and reconnect after months of no contact, I knew there was no other response than to say, “Tell me when and where and I’ll be there.”
Time strengthens you. Rear view mirrors inside each of us allow you to see where you can do better, be better, and demand better in the future. And that’s exactly what I did. I stood up for myself and told him exactly what I deserved and anything less would be nonnegotiable.
Pinwheels needs the wind to fulfill their purpose. The more turbulent the wind, the better they do what they were made to do. When life is an endless whirl of emotions, take a deep breath and watch the beauty of the world spin before you. Life can be simple if you let it. And sometimes it takes category-five hurricane winds to blow you in the direction you’re meant to be. Today, meeting at the coffee shop solidified two things for me: 1) I’m exactly WHERE I need to be in my life, and 2) I’m exactly WITH the person I need to be with. Wind doesn’t always have to be a bad thing. Especially if you make the decision to be a pinwheel.
Sincerely,
Britt
